Bush Clueless

There are some brilliantly funny people out there! This comes from Unfogged via Brad DeLong. I had heard these remarks Bush made at the UNITY: Journalists of Color Convention, and yet again had to pick my jaw up off the floor. Pleeeeeeease remove this man from office!!

Q: Good morning. My name is Mark Trahant. I'm the editorial page editor of the Seattle Post-Intelligencer and a member of the Native American Journalist Association. (Applause.) Most school kids learn about the government in the context of city, county, state and federal. And, of course, tribal governments are not part of that at all. Mr. President, you've been a governor and a President, so you have a unique experience, looking at it from two directions. What do you think tribal sovereignty means in the 21st century, and how do we resolve conflicts between tribes and the federal and the state governments?

THE PRESIDENT: Tribal sovereignty means that, it's sovereign. You're a -- you've been given sovereignty, and you're viewed as a sovereign entity. And, therefore, the relationship between the federal government and tribes is one between sovereign entities.

Now, the federal government has got a responsibility on matters like education and security to help, and health care. And it's a solemn duty. And from this perspective, we must continue to uphold that duty. I think that one of the most promising areas of all is to help with economic development. And that means helping people understand what it means to start a business. That's why the Small Business Administration has increased loans. It means, obviously, encouraging capital flows. But none of that will happen unless the education systems flourish and are strong, and that's why I told you we've spent $1.1 billion in the reconstruction of Native American schools. (Applause.)

What impresses me about this is how much Bush's answer sounds exactly like the answers you read on the short-essay exams of students who are so unprepared that the question itself makes no sense to them. Classic strategy: scratch around with a few jargony tautologies, and then change the subject to something unrelated but on which the student feels solid. End with something the professor has obviously been pushing.

Q: Describe the role that osmotic potential plays in carbohydrate transport in the phloem.

STUDENT: Carbohydrate transport is very important so that carbohydrates in the phloem can be moved to different parts of the plant. Osmotic potential is important because it is what causes osmosis, which is how water moves from hypertonic to hypotonic.

Carbohydrates are composed of carbon, hydrogen, and oxygen in the proportions 1 C, 2 H, 1 O. Sugars and starches are carbohydrates, and they are high in energy. Glucose is a carbohydrate which is converted by glycolysis into ATP. That is why carbohydrates must be transported in plants. Carbohydrate transport, like other plant characteristics, is a remarkably complex product of natural selection. (Applause.)

But it seems reporters are easier graders than I am.